Internet Marketing Jokes
Elizabeth Marsten Mar 4 2010
It was only a matter of time before I broke down and degenerated into making awful puns, dirty jokes and drawing conclusions
where none should be drawn. Without further adieu, I bring to you….very bad internet marketing jokes.
Internet Marketing Relationships
- We just weren't the same match type.
- She had too many negative keywords.
- His crawler is faster than Google's. And not in the good way.
- The awful ROI on the relationship led to contract termination.
- The cost per acquisition on my Match.com account is too high. I'm going to give Yahoo Personals a try.
- That girl has 500 error written all over her.
He 404-ed me. (For when you get stood up.)
- The title tag didn't match the site content. (The new version of the carpet doesn't match the drapes.)
- Meta keyword stuffing isn't all she was doing with him.
- You can try tweaking the algorithm, but some relationships weren't meant to be.
- You're just not on page 1 for me.
- I'm sorry, but there's no app to make me less repulsed by you.
- That was someone I should not have clicked on.
- He had more hidden text than an episode of Melrose Place.
Internet Marketing Pick Up Lines
- I did a Google image search for gorgeous with no advanced filters and your picture was the first result.
- You make me want to optimize myself.
- I don't want to Twitter, Facebook or email you. I want to CALL you.
- I checked. The alt text for your picture is “hot damn!”
- I know where you live. (Thanks Google maps.)
- We should 301 redirect to my place.
- We should 302 redirect to my place. (For one night stands only.)
- I'd re-point my nameservers for you.
- If I said I liked your Google Dance t-shirt, would you hold it against me?
- I'd like to link to you.
- If only there was a Google map to your heart.
- Let's not fight it anymore. We belong together like Microhoo.
- If content is king, consider me your queen.
- I've got an algorithm that includes you, me, some Mountain Dew and an XBox.
And so on. I could go at this all day….you know you want to comment with one of your own. Or check out Search Engine Journal's
Internet Marketing Lightbulb Jokes!
Vice President of Search Marketing
Elizabeth supervises the overall search division at Portent, which includes PPC, SEO, Social Media and Analytics. If you really want to know more about her check out her bit.ly bundle. Elizabeth has written several ebooks, is a ClickZ columnist, a Lynda.com course author, a Dummies book author and speaks on PPC across the USA at various conferences including the SMX shows, mozCon and Hero Con. Read More